Have you ever heard those words before? “We should take a break.” It hits you like a bucket of cold water. Taking a break in a relationship often spells doom for couples, but it really doesn’t have to.
What does “taking a break in a relationship” really mean?
Especially in long-term relationships taking a break can actually be a healthy thing. Often times our partner just needs some space to reassess life. It doesn’t even mean anything about the state of your relationship. It could be problems at work, or with family. Sometimes it might even just be a vague feeling of dissatisfaction with life. You don’t always try to read too much into things. Most of the time your partner just wants some time to collect his thoughts and take stock of his life.
Taking a break in a relationship can actually bring the two of you closer together. When your partner has time to evaluate his priorities in life, he may come to the conclusion that your relationship is even more important than he realized and he can come back more committed than ever before.
But taking a break in a relationship can also mean that there is trouble ahead. Some people just use the term “taking a break” as a way of breaking up with you. They just want to let you down easy. I know this isn’t good news by any means.
What can you do about it?
First thing, don’t jump to any conclusions. Like I said above, taking a break in a relationship doesn’t have to be a sign of impending doom. You really should try to understand what you partner is feeling first. Try to get some perspective on what he is going through and what the real problem is.
Have an honest discussion about it. If he just dances around the issue and doesn’t really want to talk about it, I’d be willing to bet that there’s something wrong and your relationship might be headed for stormy waters. Otherwise just take your partner’s response at face value.
Then give your partner the space he is asking for. If he asks for space to think things through and you just try to draw him closer, he will feel that you don’t understand him. He will resent you for it and feel frustrated with the relationship. This could drive an otherwise healthy relationship that had a shot at making it, to the brink of a breakup.
Your boyfriend might begin to see that his problems or dissatisfaction is not coming from his relationship with you, but from some other source. This could actually strengthen your relationship and bring the two of you closer than ever before.
So you see taking a break in a relationship can actually be a good thing. A lot of it just hinges on how honest your boyfriend is being with you. When he tells you he wants a break, dig a little deeper and try to understand where he’s coming from. It could just be perfectly innocent and having your support while he contemplates his life will only help build a stronger foundation for your relationship and to get your ex back.
|Are You Suffering Through the Pain of an Extremely Bad Breakup?
Did you know that the Ex Recovery System has an entire module dedicated to helping you manage and deal with all the messy and agonizing feelings that often accompany a breakup? Even if you don’t have any plans of trying to fix things and make up with your ex, this information can do wonders to ease your suffering. Check it out here.